Loving The Body God Gave You

When was the last time you looked in the mirror and loved what you saw? To be honest, I realized that even when I brush my teeth or get dressed or even brush my hair, I do look in the mirror, but not truly looking at myself. Do you avoid mirrors or getting your picture taken? This is not uncommon at all. But it does need to be addressed, which is why I wanted to write this blog and share 10 ways to learn to love your body. That is me, in the picture, wearing a two piece for the first time in um… maybe forever. With the overwhelming positive support from my daughter Bella, I wore it. Was it a little hard? It was a lot hard.

Women not liking the way they look is not anything new, but it’s becoming more and more of an issue with social media. In the 16th century women started wearing corsets to change their bodies to fit in the current fashionable clothes at that time. It was unhealthy and even dangerous to a woman’s health because of the extreme tight fit of the corset. But it was done anyway. Sounds a little like today’s fashion too. Women will do unhealthy or even dangerous things to their bodies to fit in what today’s society deems beautiful.

One study I read, showed that 91% of women are unhappy with their bodies in one way or another. And only 5% of women actually have what they call ‘media beauty’.  This is all based on our own personal body image. The dictionary describes body image as a person’s subjective picture or mental image of their own body and how they see themselves when looking in the mirror. As you can see this is directly related to a person’s self esteem. Self esteem is how you value and respect yourself.

The statistics on the connection between eating disorders and body image is mind blowing. And very scary. So what does this all mean to us women in today’s society? It means a change has to be made. Women need to take a stand. Way easier said than done of course. Knowing you need to accept your body is one thing, helping your kids accept their bodies is another thing, but actually truly being ok with your body and fully accepting your body as the temple God gave you, is a whole other story. 

This is not an overnight switch. This is a day in and day out reversal of your paradigms (habits). This change takes lots of effort and work. And even more importantly, it takes forgiveness and patience as you grow through this. This is actually a time when ‘fake it til you make it’ comes into play. You have to truly change your beliefs. And in order to do this you must start really looking in the mirror and saying out loud that you accept your body the way it is, over and over again, even if you don’t believe it (yet). Every day, multiple times a day, repeat how you love yourself and accept yourself, until that phrase becomes natural and engrained in your subconscious. 

As you might imagine, struggling with your body image can cause numerous negative behaviors. Depression, anxiety, suicide, alcohol and drug problems, social isolation, stress, OCD, are just a few. Fortunately in 1996 two women, Connie and Elizabeth started the Body Positivity Movement as a result of working past Connie’s eating disorder. This movement is working on helping people to begin to accept our own bodies. When you have a positive body image, you appreciate the uniqueness of your body. You have gratitude for the functions of your body. You admire the different parts and features of your body. You feel comfort and confidence in your body. You focus on the positives, not the perceived imperfections. 

Changing our body image perceptions is vital to the next generation. So how do we do this? Where do we even start? And yes I say ‘we’ as I am in the midst of this right now. Here are 10 ways you can begin to learn to accept your body.

1. Make the initial decision right now, that it is time to accept your body and be grateful for all it does for you. This is actually one of the hardest steps! But you must start somewhere.

2. You must forget the thought that looking a certain way will make you happy. Looks, things, places, are all just outside influences to bring you perceived happiness. True happiness comes from inside you.

3. You must stop judging other people’s bodies. When you judge others, you end up judging yourself because it becomes a habit, a bad habit. And judging others leads to comparing yourself to others. And nothing good comes from comparing your body to someone else’s.

4. Pay attention to your body. Get to know your body. You can do this by sitting with your eyes closed and begin by focusing on your breathing. Then start at the top of your head and think about it. Describe it, what does it feel like, do you hear anything, etc. Then work your way down to your toes. This in general is a great way to calm an anxious mind.

5. Do you know what makes your body feel good? If you do, try to include those things every day. If you don’t know what makes your body feel good, start giving it some thought. Maybe it’s a quick 15 min nap, or a walk around the block, or a nice hot bath. Maybe it’s just sitting enjoying your view from your porch for 10 min, or reading a great book. When you do things that make your body feel good your mind will automatically start connecting your body to ‘good things’ and ‘good feelings’.

6. Exercise. Yes, I know, some of you dread this. But when I say exercise this doesn’t have to be 60 min of full hard cardio, it could be simply a nice walk around your block, or having a dance party with your kids. Moving your body, whether it’s light or intense, creates endorphins which help you feel better. Maybe try yoga, hiking, or swimming.

7. Include images in your life of bodies that are realistic, natural, more like your own body. Get rid of all the fake, photoshopped images that are not real. That only makes you think about your body compared to the other one. You might need to leave certain Facebook groups or stop following certain people or celebrities. Social media can be wonderful if used properly. If it doesn’t make you feel good, leave that page.

8. Go through your closet and get rid of the clothes that don’t make you feel good. Two reasons. 1. When you see those clothes it doesn’t produce good feelings, so why keep them. 2. If you try to wear those clothes and they don’t make you feel good, well, don’t wear them. Get rid of them. 

9. Everyday, look in the mirror and say something kind about yourself. Self-talk is detrimental to feeling better. You must change those little words in your head from negative to positive. You can even post positive affirmations right on your mirror and read it aloud every time you walk in that bathroom.

10. Treat yourself the way you treat others. Talk to yourself the way you talk to people you love. If you wouldn’t tell your best friend they are ugly or you hate the way they look, then don’t do it to yourself! God made everything perfect and beautiful and on purpose, so that means He made you perfect and beautiful and on purpose. 

There are plenty of other things you can do to help make you change the way you perceive your body, but those 10 are a great way to start. You do not have to incorporate all 10 immediately on day 1. Pick one or two and stay consistent with them for a week. If it’s working great, then add on another one or two and so on. The important thing to remember is you are YOU, and there is only one of you. Take care of the body God gave you and cherish it. Be grateful for it. Don’t forget to be patient with yourself while you climb this big mountain. It might take some time, sweat, and tears. But in the end you will be in a better place physically and mentally. You’ve got this!